Issue III, Vol. XXVII, No. 316
News and happenings for, by, about and affecting the LGBT Valley.
Project of Community Link, Inc: Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Community Service Organization.
EST. September 1995
Community Link Projects
Gray Alliance News November 2021
Gray Alliance is a group for LGBTQ+ seniors, and we get together for potlucks the last Sunday of each month.
We will have a potluck Sunday November 28 at the Fireside Room of the First Congregational Church from 2-4 pm. It’s located at the south end of the church at 2131 N Van Ness Blvd in Fresno. Please note that although we are using a church facility, Gray Alliance has no religious affiliation.
If you have any questions, please contact John Richardson at 559-260-1565. Hope to see you soon!
Youth Alliance News November 2021
The month of November seemed to come out of nowhere this year! October was moving along at its usual pace, and then suddenly, it was the 31st, and November started! We’re already half-way through the month! The Thanksgiving holiday is just around the corner! Following our usual custom, the Youth Alliance will be taking Thanksgiving Day and it’s Friday off, so we are only going to meet one more time this month! And we haven’t even finished talking about LGBTQ history month, which was the month of October!
Our youth group members have read about LGBTQ pioneers and discussed them briefly over several weeks. Last week, we recapped out discussion of LGBTQ history by sharing our favorite leaders. The youth mostly shared about iconic stars, such as RuPaul and Lil Nas, and the adults chose historical figures, like Eleanor Roosevelt. It is exciting to have so many people to look up to in the LGBTQ community!
The holidays are sometimes rough on our LGBTQ youth, especially our gender non-conforming youth! They are sometimes left to be themselves for most of the year but are expected to conform to more traditional gender roles when families get together for the holidays. They are often judged or harassed by family members during the holiday season. We will be talking about their hopes and fears for the Thanksgiving holiday this coming week. But since we won’t be meeting on the Friday after Thanksgiving, we will have to talk about their actual experiences the following week!
We usually save the last Friday of the month for our world-famous potluck! Last month, we had a Halloween party! There was plenty of food, fun, and noise! Of course, because of social distancing rules, we couldn’t play musical chairs, so we had a pumpkin decorating contest while we listened to ghoulish music!
Since we’re taking Thanksgiving week off, our youth group won’t have a Thanksgiving potluck, but next month we’ll have our annual Winter Holiday party with more fun, food, and frivolity! And of course, we’ll have a White Elephant gift exchange, where folks wrap up small gifts and then compete to try to take them away from each other! The gift exchange is always a riot!
The Fresno LGBTQ Youth Alliance is now meeting in person at the Big Red Church on Friday nights from 7 to 8:30 PM! We will continue to work on our virtual meeting, as well, so that youth members who can’t attend the meeting in person can attend online! We will be sure to publish the meeting number and the password for our Zoom meeting on Facebook, and now that we’ve got our Instagram account going, we’ve published on Instagram, as well! We urge all LGBTQ school-age youth to join us Friday nights, whether in person or online!
The Source LGBT+ Center is proud to present the second annual Youth Summit on December 11, at the St Paul Episcopal Church Rivera Hall. The Our Power Youth Summit for LGBTQ+ and allied youth between the ages of 12-19 who are ready to come together outside of social media and transform the way advocacy is seen in their generation.
At this event our youth will come together in a safe setting to determine the different ways to advocate in their community through creativity, wellness, and active engagement workshops. They will learn that by coming together we can create a much more powerful voice. Local creative artist Priscilla Mcnamara as our keynote speaker. In addition to that we will have workshops to help empower our youth like Radical self love through Fresno EOC, Slam Poetry with Mike Jasso,and Know Your Rights with California Rural Legal Assistance (CRLA). Youth will receive a workshop kit to help them brainstorm notes and ideas as well as fuel up with pizza. The first 50 attendees to arrive are entered in a drawing to win a raffle gift basket worth $100!
After the workshops and closing ceremony there is an AMAZING Recharge Rave primed and ready for all youth participants. Snacks, drinks, a safe space to have fun and dance with like-minded peers. The party starts at 3:10pm and ends at 5:00pm. Let’s Glow Crazy!
Our youth will leave determined to elevate the power not only within themselves but through community as well. Amplify your voice! Register by Friday December 10, and be a part of this change our world needs. https://forms.gle/2mWiASSyZ5VVcKA86
The Source LGBT+ Center Our Power Youth Summit is supported by Elevate Youth California, which is managed by The Center at Sierra Health Foundation under contract with the State of California’s Department of Health Care Services through Proposition 64, California Cannabis Tax Fund, Allocation 3, Youth Education Prevention Early Intervention and Treatment Account.
Keep up with The Source on our social media channels on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Youtube by following "@thesourcelgbt". We also have a youth instagram to follow “@sourcelgbtyouth” — Or visit our website at thesourcelgbt.org! We have over 25k followers across our social media channels and we post daily updates about The Source's upcoming events, peer support groups, LGBTQ+ news, and more. Reach out to us through DMs! We respond to all messages within 24 hours.
Anti-LGBTQ group offers $500 bounty to turn in “divisive” teachers
Reposted from LGBTQNation.com
An anti-LGBTQ organization that thinks that books about seahorses holding tails are too risque for schools is offering a “bounty” to turn in teachers for teaching “divisive” subjects when it comes to diversity in schools.
A new law passed by Republican lawmakers in New Hampshire bans teachers from discussing “divisive topics” about racism, sexism, and diversity, part of increased conservative scrutiny on public education that has seen conservatives showing up at school boards to protest and cause chaos when it comes to diversity education, COVID-19 measures, transgender students being treated equally, and LGBTQ books in libraries.
Pulse survivor helps locate the suspect accused of setting fire to Pulse memorial
Juwan J. Holmes
Reposted from LGBTQNation.com
The Orlando Fire Department Arson and Bomb Squad has arrested a suspect in the vandalization of the Pulse National Memorial in Orlando, Florida, last month.
64-year old Mark Anthony Henson is the man authorities believe was seen on camera setting fire to the memorial, which recognizes the lives lost following a mass shooting at a LGBTQ nightclub on June 12, 2016. Henson has been charged with felony criminal mischief.
People rejoice as Pete and Chasten’s children come home from the hospital
Out Secretary of Transportation, Pete Buttigieg, and his husband, Chasten, announced last week that their children, Gus and Penelope, are safely recovering at home after spending several weeks in and out of the hospital for a childhood respiratory virus. Their son, Gus, had
the worst reaction to the virus, and was on a respirator for a week, following several trips to the hospital. Buttigieg and his husband posted on Twitter that the kids were finally home and doing well, thanking all the folks for “all of the love and prayers.”
Buttigieg was back to work last week, and following the passing of the President’s infrastructure deal, Buttigieg was busy making appearances on CNN and Fox News to discuss the ramifications, such as money for roads and bridges, better ports and airports, more internet access, a more stable electricity grid nationwide, and more electric vehicles.
Target’s Pride Nutcracker is making the Yuletide gayer
A queer nutcracker at the nationwide retailer Target is becoming quite the item this holiday season. The Pride Nutcracker is decked from head to toe in queer representation, holding a rainbow flag. One TikTok video featuring the doll has racked up more than 549,000
views. The hype has gotten to the point that many stores are selling out and folks wanting the nutcracker so badly are asking other people on Twitter where they can find one.
Twitter and TikTok users have been having a genuine laugh about the doll. A TikTok user wrote, “It reeks of rainbow capitalism…That being said, Hell, yeah.” Another called the doll the “yassification of the nutcracker” and another simply wrote, “Sleigh.”
Taiwan chosen to host WorldPride 2025
WorldPride 2025 will be held in Kaohsiung City, Taiwan, which will be the first time a WorldPride celebration will take place in an East Asian country. Kaohsiung Pride beat out Washington DC’s Capital Pride Alliance to host the event.
The decision was announced on Wednesday, November 13, 2021, after more than 300 member organizations met virtually during InterPride’s 2021 general meeting. The WorldPride Taiwan Team 2025 announced that they will begin the 4-year journey immediately to ignite change in Asia and to advance human rights in the world.
Cardi B wants to officiate Kal Penn’s gay wedding
Kal Penn, the Harold and Kumar star, spotted Cardi B on a recent flight to LA, and tweeted that he fell asleep on the flight and dreamt that Cardi B officiated his wedding to his partner, Josh. The tweet caught Cardi’s eye, and she responded, saying, “First, why didn’t you
say, Hi? Second, I’m licensed to do that sooo……let me know.” Penn made it clear that if the offer is real, he’s ready to say Yes to her offer. He tweeted, “We’re down if you’re down,” to which Cardi responded, “I’m down. I’ll get my suit.”
3 Middle Eastern countries are banning Eternals over gay kiss & Jolie isn’t here for it
Reposted from LGBTQNation.com
Eternals, the newest movie in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, will not be shown in Saudi Arabia, Qatar, or Kuwait because it includes a gay kiss. Homosexuality is illegal in all three countries.
Angelina Jolie, one of the flick’s stars, didn’t hold back when she shared her thoughts on the Middle Eastern countries’ decision.
What if you don’t think of yourself as self?
How many times have you looked at a photo of yourself and thought, “Ugh!?” What exactly do you see that you don’t like? Perhaps examining your self-image would be more productive than your outer image. How you perceive yourself is very important because it helps define your sense of self.
However, what if you did not see yourself as only yourself? What if, instead, you chose to think of yourself as a part of the greater whole? When a raindrop falls into a pool, does the raindrop remain separate, or does it become one with the pool? When you think of yourself as a member of the global family, the whole world is yours. With that perspective, there is no need to get upset or defensive when things don’t go your way.
Say you work in a restaurant. You and the other workers labor diligently for long hours to make sure the customers are content. But somehow it’s the regional manager who gets much of the praise and rewards. If you let go of the ego-driven need to take individual credit for the work and think of the labor as a team effort instead, you will be far less likely to feel upset.
Likewise, at the office, you can learn to let go of being emotionally married to your ideas or projects. (Some office workers refer to a project as their “baby.” Really? Now that’s getting pretty emotionally attached!) When you start viewing yourself as part of humanity, you can let go of ego defensiveness. Then, even when criticized by a coworker, you can think of the work as a group effort, and that can take the sting out of the criticism. In that light, you don’t need to take things personally because comments about you are comments about all humans in general.
At home, you can teach your children to take pride in group accomplishments rather than seeking attention through individual deeds. And if your kids are in sports, you can teach them ego control by helping them to understand that they do not need to be the star in the spotlight constantly.
The glory seekers are the ones who tend to crash and burn. Children and adults, alike, can discover that when you have integrity, there is no need to worry about your image and reputation. Then your teenagers don’t need to stay up at night fretting over what their peers might be saying about them because character stands for itself.
Once you have reached the point where you can see yourself as part of humankind rather than king-of-the-hill, a sense of interconnectedness and peacefulness will come over you. In social situations, you can speak up more freely without the worry of disapproval, and you also do not have to be so concerned with choosing just the right word to say.
And when people do insult you, (and they will) you can feel sorry for them instead of taking it to heart. Think of it this way: the people doing the criticizing must be pretty unhappy if they need to say such mean things, right? (Tell me; when people are insulting you, are you able to see the unhappiness in their eyes? I bet you can if you look for it.) So have compassion for them; they are emotionally suffering. That’s an enlightened way of looking at it.
For my part, whenever I submit my work for publication, I need to let go of my ego first and graciously accept constructive feedback from the editorial staff (and sometimes the readers, too). I remove my ego from the equation by meditating before I begin writing. Typically, I will sit in a comfortable position with my head bowed and my hands on my knees. After a time of quiet stillness, I will focus my mind on the wisdom of the ancestors—all the ancestors from the entire human race, yours, and mind. Then I slowly place my hands on the keyboard and start typing.
Some refer to this process as tapping into “cellular wisdom.” Others call it “channeling energy.” While still others simply refer to it as “prayer.” For myself, I do not feel the need to put a label on it. I just let the positive energy flow through me into my writing. When complimented on my work, I tell people I cannot take credit for the “spirit” of my writing because I am simply utilizing the wisdom of our shared universal ancestors. In that way, I do not need to satisfy my pride since ego is not involved.
Something to meditate on today. The next time your family criticizes you, instead of getting defensive, focus your attention on showing compassion. Try to see things from their perspective. Understand that they are upset because they are hurting. Listen to both their words and the hurt behind those words.
Instead of getting defensive, express concern for your family. Even though you are the target of the criticism, think to yourself, “We are a family, and therefore, when even one of us is put down, we are all lowered together.” That way, there is no need to defend your ego. Just focus your attention on loving others with understanding.
Your Intellectual Whore
"An effervescently gay advice columnist."
Disclaimer: Although the author of this syndicated column holds a doctorate in clinical psychology, the tongue-in-cheek advice given is for entertainment only and is not a substitute for therapy. Barbie responds to all emails...whether you deserve it or not. Send your questions to Uncle Barbie at:
Dear Uncle Barbie,
There is this guy I know from high school who is now a minister. He still has a crush on me even though we graduated over 25 years ago. He is not stalking me or anything like that, but every time I run into him around town, he expresses an interest in going out with me. I have been married for 16 years, and he knows that. I have told him a million times that I am not interested in him, but he just doesn’t get it! I can’t believe that he is so obsessed that he is not able to get over me. What kind of a minister is he, anyway? My question to you is this, what causes a person like this to get so hooked on someone that they never seem to get over it? And if I could ask a second question, what do I have to do to convince him that I will never go out with him?
Signed, So Tired of It
Hello Mrs. Tired,
Oh, you poor tired thing. Boy, that guy seems like a real heel. He is like a floating poop that just won’t go down. No matter how many times you flush, he just keeps circling around but never quite goes away. And closing the lid doesn’t work, either. He may be out of sight, but he still makes himself known--the scent lingers on. One quick whiff will tell you he’s not far away. You might think that turning your back and trying to ignore him will make him go away--but NO, don’t believe it! I can assure you; his signature stench will still hang in the heavy air like the odor of a raunchy one night stand. (Okay, enough of that.)
It seems clear to me that this guy is living in a fantasy world--and unfortunately, YOU are a part of it! I think what you should do is ruin his fantasy of you. (Oh, here’s a great idea!) Try giving him a taste of his own medicine. The next time you run into him, cling to him like a sticky booger. Talk his arm off, and only talk about yourself. While you are at it, make sure you work the words, “marriage” and “commitment” into your one-sided conversation. Most men can’t stand the thought of a marriage commitment. Nothing will chase this guy away faster than discussing wedding plans. He won’t just walk away from you…he’ll run!
A Flair for the Dramatic, Barbie
by Eric Biglione
ARIES (Mar 21-Apr 19)
You're are about as stable as it gets. Now is the time to push forward and get things done. Learn from others and it all comes together.
TAURUS (Apr 20-May 20)
You feel your hard work isn't paying off. It is, you just can't see it yet. A payoff is coming.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20)
All is going smoothly. Try not to take on more then you can handle. One thing at a time. You will need to make a budget for the holiday to keep you from spending too much.
CANCER (June 21-July 22)
You are going to have to come out of your shell to deal with others. It's uncomfortable but it needs to be done. Let your voice be heard.
LEO (July 23-Aug 22)
Other people are wearing you out and it is getting on your nerves. You are going to have to compromise then push what you want to do.
VIRGO (Aug 23-Sep 22)
You stand out well enough but you get hung up on details that really don't matter. You could really use an anchor here to give direction. Hang in there.
LIBRA (Sep 23-Oct 22)
You are a really practical person at this time. Just the essentials make you happy. So enjoy yourself and keep in touch.
SCORPIO (Oct 23-Nov 21)
You are a ball of fire. Hard work and spending is the game and you are in for it. Keep your ducks in a row and you will be alright.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov 22-Dec 21)
You are a ball of fire here but be careful not to step on toes or it can come back to you. Only do something if it makes sense.
CAPRICORN (Dec 22- Jan 19)
You tend to be a little complacent here. You need to kick yourself in the pants to get going. Once you do you really can accomplish a lot here.
AQUARIUS (Jan 20-Feb 18)
You're over reacting a lot. It's business as usual nothing more but it is important to get things done.
PISCES (Feb 19-Mar 20)
Life is not going to be dull for the holidays. Make plans and don't let the stress get to you. A payday is just around the corner.
The Our Power Youth Summit is an event for LGBTQ+ and allied youth between the ages of 12-19 who are ready to come together outside of social media and transform the way advocacy is seen in their generation.
At this event our youth will come together in a safe setting to determine the different ways to advocate in their community through creativity, wellness, and active engagement workshops. They will learn that by coming together we can create a much more powerful voice.
Our youth will leave determined to elevate the power not only within themselves but through community as well. Amplify your voice! Register by Friday December 10, and be a part of this change our world needs.