Issue VIII, Vol. XXIV, No 284 | April 2019

News and happenings for, by, about and affecting the LGBT Valley.
Project of Community Link, Inc: Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Community Service Organization. 
EST. September 1995

Community Link Projects

 

Gray Alliance is a group for LGBT seniors, and we get together twice a month for social functions.

We have a potluck the final Sunday of each month at the First Congregational Church Fireside Room from 2-4 pm. It’s located at the south end of the church campus at 2131 N Van Ness Blvd in Fresno. Please note that although we are using a church facility, Gray Alliance has no religious affiliation.

The second Wednesday of the month at 6 pm we meet at different restaurants. For information on the next restaurant we’re going to or if you have any questions, please call: 

John Richardson at 559-260-1565 or Linda Schinkel at 559-356-7220.

Hope to see you soon!

YOUTH ALLIANCE NEWS
David McGee

 

April brought us lovely spring weather! Everything is alive and green! The explosion of California poppies across the state has become a phenomenon for all to view! Adults everywhere are working in their yards, trying to stay ahead of the weeds and grass! And our LGBTQ youth—they spend the day playing video games and watching anime! They have no interest in the spring weather! Their only concern is what to do for their spring break—which will probably be playing more video games and watching anime!
 

Our primary group leader, Rachel AKA Banana, has been in and out of the group. She was here a week ago, and used the group session to help the youth focus on a theme they want to use for the LGTBQ Rainbow Pride Parade that is coming up in June. The group members decided they want to use the 2019 Pride theme of “2Gether” and add “we fight,” to show their alliance with the Stonewall riots that launched LGBTQ pride celebrations so many years ago. Let’s hope that Banana can join us for a few more meetings to help us make signs to carry down the parade route on June 1!

Last week, Elder David ran the group while our Grand Poobah, Jeffery Robinson, stepped out to work out some details with his Qistory Co-chair, Dr. Kat Fobear. David had the group discuss their 
sleeping habits and asked for a sampling of their dreams! We have a lot of night owls in our youth group, which makes it hard for our LGBTQ youth to get up and go to school in the morning! A lot of our members also shared that they have

trouble falling asleep and staying asleep, so we discussed ways to help young sleepers get to sleep when the time comes to go to bed. Everyone shared a nightmare they had experienced! Even Jeffery and David shared a nightmare with the group! It was a good discussion and everyone seemed to enjoy it!
 

We save the last Friday of the month for our out-of-this-world potluck! Last month we had the usual potluck foods, like pizza, chips, and soda! But two of our members brought homemade brownies, and we had an impromptu brownie competition! It seemed like Jonah’s brownies were the favorite, but nobody would complain if someone else brought brownies next time for another taste test! As usual, there was plenty of food and plenty of noise at our potluck! Everyone had a great time eating and talking! Potluck nights are a great time for new members to join us, because we don’t ask a lot of questions of the group! We just eat and socialize! Easy-peasy!
 

The Fresno LGBTQ Youth Alliance meets on Friday nights, at 7 PM, in the Fireside Room of the First Congregational Church (The Big Red Church), located at 2131 N. Van Ness, in Fresno. We welcome any and all LGBTQ youth and their allies, ages 14-25, to join us on Friday nights! Check out our Facebook page for reminders about the group! We usually post a reminder about the group meetings on Friday mornings! Just go to our Facebook page, “Fresno GLBTQ (yes, in that order) Youth Alliance,” to check it out!

BOWLING 4 PRIDE
Pictures By: Ray Quenga Photography

Local

 

LGBTQ+ ORAL & PUBLIC HISTORY CLASS

Do you want to learn more about LGBTQ+ History?

Do you want to gain valuable skills oral history and archiving?

Do you want to work with community to build a public archive?

 

Then Check Out This Exciting New Class Next Fall!

 

LGBTQ+ Oral and Public History

WS 151T, Fall 2019 with Dr. Kat Fobear

Tuesdays & Thursday, 9:30-10:45 am, SS 208

 

This course examines public history and oral history from feminist and queer standpoints, focusing on the lives of lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans and queer communities in the Central Valley.

 

Students will investigate how oral history provides an avenue to raise public consciousness by recording and analyzing the stories of the LGBTQ+ community who have been left out of the historical record.

 

Students gain practical experience in oral history interviewing and public history preservation by working together with community members to develop an LGBTQ+ oral history archive that will be widely available.

 

This class will be working with Community Link in order to document and preserve the history of Pride in Fresno. Next year marks the 30th anniversary of the Fresno Pride Parade. We will be interviewing previous and current Pride organizers, performers, and participants.

 

Come join this exciting opportunity to not only learn, but preserve history!

 

For more information, please email: Dr. Kat Fobear  katherinefobear@mail.fresnostate.edu

Come and help us celebrate this momentous occasion – it’s 21 years since our church voted to become Open & Affirming. At the April 27 fundraiser we’ll have guests who will remind us of the groundbreaking nature of that vote. In honor of our anniversary we’ll also be donating part of the proceeds to organizations that support local and international LGBTQ rights – the work continues.

 

Tickets are on sale for $25 after church and in the church office – use cash, check or credit card. Tickets will also be available at the door but we encourage you to buy your tickets and make your meal selection now (beef tenderloin, salmon or stuffed Portobello) to help us with our planning.

 

CUCC folks like each other. Fellowship is important to us. We enjoy each other’s company. The dinner on April 27 is not only your chance to celebrate together; it is also your chance to sign up for wonderful parties and events scheduled throughout the coming year. You’ll be able to purchase these at the party at a set price per person – first come, first served. Take a look at this year’s events and decide what you’d like to sign up for. Help us meet our fundraising goal and get to know each other at the same time.

 

The evening will also give you the chance to bid on unique items – you could win a personal assistant, gorgeous jewelry, delicious traditional pies or a week at Shaver Lake!! Please see the current listing of events and silent auction items donated by our generous members and friends. If you feel inspired to donate an event or silent auction item, there’s still time. Contact Nancy Pressley (312-8621, npressley1944@gmail.com).

 

Put April 27 on your calendar and plan to come and Party for Community with your CUCC friends – you’ll experience an evening of fun and the chance to participate in A Year of Congregating Opportunities.

SAVE THE DATE
Merced LGBTQ Alliance

HUGE announcement.

Merced Pride 2019 will take place DOWNTOWN on Main Street.

More details to follow in the coming months.

Get pumped!

ACCEPTING NONBINARY, QUEER AND NEW PRONOUNS
Nicole Murray Ramirez
Reposted from gay-sd.com 


As someone who grew up in the 1950s and ‘60s I recently finally came to terms that I have had difficulty in accepting and understanding some changes that have and are going on in our LGBT community. For me, my “truth” and life has been as a homosexual, a pre-operative transsexual and now a gay man. My generation has always had a difficult time with the word “queer” because for us this word was always a very negative, ugly and violent word used against us for decades.

When some of our younger LGBTQ generation started using and describing themselves with the word queer it has made many of us uncomfortable and reminded us of past attacks and bad incidents in our lives. I also come from a time that we fought just to be called gay men and women  and not homosexuals. We were the gay community and that covered all of us and honestly the word lesbian was added, and we became the gay and lesbian community. Many people thought that was dividing the men and women in our community when in truth it was empowering our lesbian community. Having lived as a pre-operative transsexual in Hollywood and fighting for transsexual equality I have to admit it was difficult for some of us when the word transgender came about and the transgender umbrella was lumped in with transvestites, cross-dressers, drag queens all under this umbrella. In in my days, transsexual meant you wanted to change your sex period. I grew up in the era of Christine Jorgenson, an American trans woman known for having sex reassignment surgery in her 20s in 1951, having to go to Denmark to have the surgery done.

continue reading at gay-sd.com

Download the Rules and Application: HERE

National

 

PEREZ HILTON OUT SULTAN OF BRUNEI'S SON AFTER COUNTRY ENACTS NEW LAW THAT WOULD STONE GAY PEOPLE
Bil Browning
Reposted from LGBTQNation.com

 

Perez Hilton has outed the Sultan of Brunei’s son – fourth in line to the throne – as a gay man after his father enacted Shariah law in the country. The punishment for homosexuality and adultery is death from stoning.
 

As worldwide outrage mounts and calls to boycott the Sultan’s chain of luxury hotels and airline, Hilton alleged that Prince Azim is gay in a video he uploaded to YouTube.
 

The young royal has frequently been photographed with queer celebrities like Caitlyn Jenner and Gus Kenworthy. After blowback from activists, Kenworthy deleted a photo he had uploaded to social media of the two of them together at a party hosted by the prince.

continue reading at LGBTQNation.com

SECRETARY DEVOS SAYS SHE KNEW HER ACTIONS WOULD HARM TRANS STUDENTS
Alex Bollinger
Reposted from LGBTQNation.com

 

Secretary of Education Betsy DeVos said that she was aware of research showing how harmful her anti-transgender guidance two years ago was.
 

DeVos appeared before the civil rights subcommittee of the House Education Committee.
 

The subcommittee chair, Representative Suzanne Bonamici (D-OR) asked DeVos if she knew that “the stress of harassment and discrimination can lead to lower attendance and grades as well as depression and anxiety for transgender students” when she reversed Obama-era guidelines that told schools that discrimination against transgender students is illegal under Title IX.

continue reading at LGBTQNation.com

PETE BUTTIGIEG ROCKETS TO 3RD PLACE IN NEW HAMPSHIRE PRESIDENTIAL PRIMARY POLLING
Bil Browning
Reposted from LGBTQNation.com

 

Out presidential candidate Pete Buttigieg has surged to third place in the early primary state of New Hampshire, a new poll of registered voters shows. Buttigieg trails former Vice President Joe Biden and Senator Bernie Sanders.
 

The three men are the only candidates polling in double digits. 22.9% favor Biden, 15.6% prefer Sanders, and Buttigieg claimed 10.7%.

continue reading at LGBTQNation.com

Shutterstock

CELEBRITIES AND ACTIVISTS BLAST TRUMP'S TRANS MILITARY BAN
David McGee

 

The transgender military ban imposed by President Trump went into effect on Friday, April 12, 2019, ending the careers of over 13,000 trans service members.

In response, public 
figures from politics, entertainment, and activism turned to social media to blast the policy.
 

Among the dissenters was Hillary Clinton and Cher, who took to Twitter to make strong statements against Trump’s policy.

Representative Joe Kennedy III tweated, “To all the trans 
service members & their families, please know that this country sees you & we are grateful for your sacrifice.”

Source: advocate.com

TAYLOR SWIFT DONATES THOUSANDS TO LGBTQ ADVOCACY GROUP IN TENNESSEE
David McGee

Taylor Swift, who lives in Nashville, Tennessee, donated $113,000 to an LGBTQ advocacy group on Monday, April 8, 2019, for their work at combating a series of anti-LGBTQ bills in the state. Chris Sanders, who leads the project, stated that Swift “sees our struggle in Tennessee and continues to add her voice with so many good people, including religious leaders, who are speaking out for love in the face of fear.”

Source: huffpost.com

SAN JOSE WILL ALLOW CHICK-FIL-A TO OPEN A RESTAURANT IN THEIR AIRPORT
David McGee

Airports in Texas and New York have recently scrapped plans to allow Chick-fil-A to place restaurants in their airports due to its history of discrimination against LGBTQ individuals.


However, San Jose, California, recently voted to allow the restaurant in their Mineta Airport, with the plan of hoisting rainbow flags and transgender flags in the airport in order to support LGBTQ flyers.

Former County Supervisor told the San Jose Mercury News that the flags will send airport patrons a “counter-signal” to the “discrimination supported by Chick-fil-A.”


Source: huffpost.com

YOUNG HOLLYWOOD IS JUST LOVING WHO THEY WANNA LOVE
Dan Clarendon
Reposted from Queerty.com

 

Ariana Grande had a “Monopoly” on the entertainment news cycle this week, after singing that she likes “women and men” in her new song with Victoria Monet. On April 1, the day the single dropped, Grande endorsed a fan’s tweet about how the pop star isn’t going to label herself. “I haven’t before and still don’t feel the need to now,” Grande responded.
 

The 25-year-old’s attitude toward sexuality mirrors that of many other Hollywood stars: They don’t feel the need to put a label on their sexuality.

continued at Queerty.com

THANKS TO MASSACHUSETTS, 32% OF STATES NOW BAN CONVERSION THERAPY. BUT HERE COME THE COURTS...
Daniel Villareal
Reposted from Queerty.com


Yesterday, Massachusetts Governor Charlie Baker signed a law “banning licensed health care professionals from providing conversion therapy to anyone under 18,” according to MassLive.com. This makes Massachusetts the 16th U.S. state to ban the harmful pseudo-psychological practice (along with Washington D.C. and Puerto Rico), but courts are starting to scrutinize their legality with the potential to overturn them.

The other U.S. states that ban ex-gay conversion therapy are California, Connecticut, Delaware, Hawaii, Illinois, Maryland, Nevada, New Hampshire, New Jersey, New Mexico, New York, Oregon, Rhode Island, Vermont and Washington.

continue reading at Queerty.com

MORMON CHURCH DROPS ANTI-GAY POLICIES TO "REDUCE HATE & CONTENTION" IN SOCIETY
Bil Browning
Reposted from LGBTQNation.com


Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints President Russell Nelson’s changes to the Mormon church’s doctrines continue as the denomination announced they would change church policy on married gay couples and their children.

 

“Previously, our Handbook characterized same-gender marriage by a member as apostasy,” the church said in a statement. “While we still consider such a marriage to be a serious transgression, it will not be treated as apostasy for purposes of Church discipline. Instead, the immoral conduct in heterosexual or homosexual relationships will be treated in the same way.”

continue reading at LGBTQNation.com

International

 

CUBA JUST STARTED GIVING PrEP AWAY FOR FREE TO THOSE WHO NEED IT
Gwendolyn Smith
Reposted from LGBTQNation.com


A pilot program that began on March 6 has Cuban officials distributing pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP) to those in need.


According to a report in Granma, the official newspaper of the Central Committee of the Cuban Communist Party, 28 people in Cárdenas, some 90 miles from Havana, have been supplied with PrEP. It is being provided free of charge to those in need.

continue reading at LGBTQNation.com

THE HAPPIEST COUNTRIES IN THE WORLD PROTECT THEIR LGBTQ CITIZENS FROM DISCRIMINATION
Gwendolyn Smith
Reposted from LGBTQNation.com


The latest edition of the World Happiness Report has been released, and one finding isn’t a surprise to those of us who are LGBTQ: of the 156 countries covered in the report, nine out of the top ten have laws that protect their LGBTQ residents.

 

The top countries are, in order: Finland, Denmark, Norway, Iceland, The Netherlands, Switzerland, Sweden, New Zealand, Canada, and Austria.

continued reading at LGBTQNation.com

Enlighten Me

 

CONSTRUCTIVELY DEALING WITH ANGER
Mark Langefeld

 

When it comes to anger management, I find it best to give a specific example from which to draw lessons. Several years ago, a client relayed a story that happened between her and a disgruntled customer. Berenice worked in a fast food restaurant, and she’s good at what she does. She serves customers with a smile and is always courteous.

 

One busy evening a man entered the restaurant and stood at the counter, he seemed to have come in angry. After his order was placed, he needed to wait a few minutes because the food was being made fresh off the grill, not piled up under a heating lamp.

 

Within a very short time, the man stormed up to the counter, interrupted the present order being taken by another customer, and started to berate Berenice. “I gave you my order several minutes ago, and I’m still waiting. Why don’t you just commit suicide so no one else has to put up with you?!” Berenice was in tears, and the manager asked the irate man to leave—which he did without further incident.

 

So how can we learn from this story? Well, for one thing we can start with the premise that humans want to feel valued. Let’s face it; people believe that they are important. Therefore, when they think that they are being ignored and made to wait, they get angry. The question then becomes, what to do with that anger. How can we redirect that negative energy into a positive direction?

 

If someone you are dealing with is upset, silently ask yourself, "What emotion is that person experiencing?" This helps you empathize and emotionally connect with that individual. Imagine how you would feel if you were in the other person’s situation. Of course, this does not mean that you should allow the person to verbally abuse you. You always deserve to be treated with human dignity—even when you make a mistake. So don’t ever think that just because you messed up you deserve to be shamed and disgraced.

 

Sometimes when a person is flying off the handle and ranting, I will speak in a consoling voice and say, "Has it been one of those days?" This is the best line I have ever used to tactfully let the person know that he or she is yelling. You would be surprised how often the other person doesn’t even realize it. Hey, sometimes it even happens to me. When I get agitated, I raise my voice without realizing it. It is not until someone else points it out that I suddenly catch myself and lower my voice.

 

One other way to raise the awareness of the other person is to reflect what he or she is saying. This does not mean repeated everything the person says word for word. Instead, just summaries the main points. I have found that this often helps calm the angry person down because you are demonstrating that you understand. Then, the person feels heard. And, when someone feels heard, a certain peacefulness seems to take place.

 

It usually doesn’t help to be disagreeable with people who are angry. Of course, you don’t have to outright agree with them either. Rather, you can just make neutral statements such as, “Hmmm, I see.” Or, “I didn’t know you felt that way.” Just remember to avoid giving advice or blaming them—even if you think the problem is all their fault. Blaming will only make them defensive. Put another way, blaming is counterproductive. You don’t like it when someone places blame on you, do you? Can you see how blaming can produce anger?

 

Let’s be blunt; sarcasm is a form of aggression. Don’t use it—ever! Other forms of verbal aggression include personal insults, criticism, and bullying behavior such as picking on the person. The fastest way to have anger spiral out of control is to start using these aggressive tactics. If your goal is to have a civil conversation with the other person, then aggression needs to be illuminated.

 

One other suggestion is to be sure that your words match your facial expression. This type of congruency engenders credibility. If your words do not match your expression—such as when you smile even though you are hurt and offended—then the person with whom you are talking to will sense that mixed message and become confused. Likewise, don’t narrow your eyes with an angry glare while saying through tight lips, “It’s Ok. No problem. I’m fine. No, really. I’m fine.”

 

Today’s Loving Suggestion: You are going to face angry people in your life sooner or later. It is inevitable. It’s best to learn how to deal with angry people effectively. Try to understand their point of view. Let them know you understand by summarizing what you heard them saying. Once they know that you have heard and understood their message, they most likely will calm down. If not and they become verbally abusive towards you, then it is time to practice a little self-love and leave the situation. You can’t win them all.

New Wellness

 

MAYbe IT’S THE BEST MONTH! 
Ron Blake

Ladies and gentlemen of Fresno…start your engines! Things are certainly going to heat up in the fifth month of the year. But never mind those warmer temperatures. There are plenty of really cool days in my fabulous forecast to make you feel a whole lot better. And that is good for your wellness. 

The month of May gets started with a big day of celebrations. It’s for all the pagans and labor union workers in our dynamic LGBTQ family. And for all who stand with them on their big day. It is known as May Day and we participate in two awesome observances in different but fascinating ways.  

 

May Day is also called Beltane and it can bring out the pagan in lots of us. Why not? It’s about celebrating fertility, flowers, and the coming of the summertime. There ain’t nothing bad about any of that goodness! 

 

On this two-for-one day we also recognize International Workers Day with union workers like carpenters, electricians, and heavy equipment operators. (very proud of my iron worker brother Matt in Chicago’s Local 1) Our blue-collar pals that keep our communities vibrant. We gotcha back Rosie the Riveter! 

 

May The Fourth Be With You on May 4th. It became the Star Wars holiday because some fun bloke thought it would be clever to use a pun on the famous movie phrase May the force be with you. So now on this cosmic day we celebrate Luke, Leia, Han, Chewbacca, the Death Star, Darth Vader, etc. Exciting the day will be. Yoda concurs. 

 

Put away your light saber my Jedi friends and get ready for the Mariachi band. Cinco de Mayo is for good gregarious gringos and gringas to drink margaritas and dance and eat salsa. 

 

Sure it’s more of an American holiday than a Mexican one. Leave it to so many millions of red, white, and blue party monsters to find a fun way to embrace the green, white, and red for 24 hours. On this day there is no wall. We are all one. Viva Mexico! 
 

On May the 12th, we get to celebrate the reason we are all here today. We honor our Momma’s in our historic neighborhood and around our country. She answers to many names in a variety of homes…Mommy, Ma, Mother, Madre, or Mum. 
 

But on this special occasion we remember the kisses on the forehead at bedtime and even the soap in the mouth after we spoke in those “strange and different” tongues. Through the good and the bad, we made it together. And we owe it all to you. Thanks Mom and abrazos para ti! 

 

And finally to close out the month and start the summer; I give you…Memorial Day. A day to honor the brave men and women who gave so much and sometimes all so that we can have freedom.  

 

After a moment of silence to honor our heroes; grab a burger and an ice-cold beer and turn on the baseball game. It just doesn’t get any more star-spangled that that.  

 

You May not be able to bring back April. And you May not be able to grab hold of June just yet. No worries. You’ve got the best month to make the most healthy fun of it all. The one you’re in right now. Go out and enjoy these May days. 

 

This article of aMAYzing is brought to you by that guy who loves burgers with MAYo. That guy who is the unofficial MAYor of LGBTQland is Ron Blake & is never disMAYed to receive your messages at rblake5551@hotmail.com. 

Uncle Barbie

 

Your Intellectual Whore
"An effervescently gay
advice columnist."

 

Disclaimer: Although the author of this syndicated column holds a doctorate in clinical psychology, the tongue-in-cheek advice given is for entertainment only and is not a substitute for therapy. Barbie responds to all emails...whether you deserve it or not. Send your questions to Uncle Barbie at:
askunclebarbie@aol.com

 

VERBAL VOMIT IN ALPHABET SOUP

 

Dear Uncle Barbie,
 

I understand that you, Uncle Barbie, hold a doctorate in clinical psychology. This is commendable of course, but I'm wondering if one of the reasons you decided to become proficient in this area might have been to learn enough to justify your lifestyle to others as well as yourself.

 

While watching Monty Python recently it came to me that in a strange sort of way they are helping people who must go mad. Instead of a mental hospital which is sort of a re-servicing factory for human breakdowns they are providing an outlet for people who have traveled further and consequently, may be more lost than psychiatrists and other sane people, can find their way further into inner space and time, and back again. Instead of the degradation ceremonial of psychiatric examination, diagnosis and prognostication, we need, for those who are ready for it...an initiation ceremonial through which the person will be guided with full social encouragement and sanction into inner space and time, by people who have been there and back again.

 

Psychiatrically, this would appear as ex-patients helping future patients go mad. When a person goes mad, a profound transposition of his place in relation to all domains of being occurs. His center of experience moves from ego to self. Mundane time becomes merely anecdotal, only the eternal matters. Madness need not be all breakdown. It may also be breakthrough. It is potentially liberation and renewal as well as enslavement and existential death.
 

Signed, Whomever

 

Hello Who?

Wow, you said a mouth full. It took me quite a while to muddle my way through your longwinded composition. (You make run-on sentences a work of art.) I must say, I got lost trying to swim the murky waters of your vocabulary. Reading your complex sentence structure is like trying to make out words floating in a hot, steamy bowl of alphabet soup--the letters may be there, but they just don't say anything! Are you trying to impress me with your "big words?" I couldn't help but notice that there was a stylistic discrepancy between the first paragraph in your letter and the second. The "mood" was different between the two. The first part used rather plain and simplistic terminology. Then, in the second part, you suddenly launched into a frenzy of sophisticated syntax. Don't get me wrong; I enjoyed frolicking in your little linguistic festival and colorful metaphors, but I think it was a bit over done. It’s similar to driving 100 MPH down the freeway with your head out the window. It’s just too much! I must say, though, your letter is a good example of literary demolition of sorts. So this is what it feels like to be chained to the grammatical wrecking ball--God, I love clichés. (Somebody stop me; I’m out of control!)

 

I get the feeling that you are using the text from someone else. Are you quoting something clever from a Monty Python script? (It sounds like their style.) If you are...you really should put quotation marks around it and cite your source. Otherwise, it is considered plagiarism. (On the other hand, I could be totally mistaken, and maybe you DID created your entire letter from the dark chambers of your own mind.) But enough of all that. Let me answer your question. Oh, wait...that's right...you didn't ask me any questions! This gives more credence to my original thought that you really only wrote this letter because you wanted to dazzle me with your glittery self. Well, relax. You don't need to work so hard to gain my approval. I have pretty low standards to begin with. Let's face it...my advice column is like a sympathetic ear to those in our society who can't find anyone more civilized to listen to them.

 

The closest thing that comes to a question in your letter was when you pontificated on my motivation for earning a doctorate in clinical psychology. You wrote, “…I'm wondering if one of the reasons you decided to become proficient in this area might have been to learn enough to justify your lifestyle to others as well as yourself.” As a scientist of human behavior, I need to be open to self-examination--without bias. So I concede that you may have a point. I do have a tendency to intellectualize sexual behavior (in myself and others). However, just to give you a little history behind all of this…I believe the whole counseling profession originated from prostitution. (Actually, it’s been said that prostitution is the oldest profession, so perhaps all careers evolved out of that--hmmm.) Historically, people would visit a prostitute not only for sex but also for a little understanding, emotional comfort, sympathy, advice, and human interaction. To this day, men and women make appointments to see a therapist for “human contact.” It’s not sexual contact…but think about it--the client is still paying the therapist for a little understanding, emotional comfort, sympathy, advice, and human interaction. (Sound familiar?) Although the counselor is not physically touching the client, we are still “touching” them with our words.

 

Since you seem to favor language and fancy words (based on your letter), have you ever done any research on the origins of the word, therapist? (This should blow your mind!) If you put a slash mark between the E and the R in the word, therapist, you will see that the term becomes two words--the/rapist. This is because therapists “penetrate” the mind. (Ya gotta admit, when a person goes in for a psychological evaluation, there is a lot a “probing” going on.) It’s not a sexual thing…it’s more of a mind f**k. I can’t speak for all therapists, but quite frankly, I tend to think of myself as simply being a polished intellectual whore. (It keeps me humble.) So I tip my hat to you for successfully analyzing this advice columnist. Congratu-f***ing-lations! Now you can sit back, revel in your brilliant idioms, and bask in the glowing radiance of your self-importance. (Or maybe I’m just projecting.) Wrap your mind around that!
 

Your Intellectual Whore, Barbie

Horoscopes

 

ARIES ( Mar 21 - Apr 19)
Full speed ahead with new ideas and plans. Some of it can backfire so be willing to make some concessions.

 

TAURUS (Apr 20 - May 20) 
Wow. A breath of fresh air is breathed into your life. You can feel it affect. Others gravitate to you. It maybe unsettling but its all good. 


GEMINI (May 21 - June 20)
Lots of energy in your life. You may step on some toes with your actions so be respectful of other's ideas. You can accomplish a lot here and have fun doing it. 


CANCER (June 21 - Jul 22)
You just can't seem to get any footing in your life. Old problems just seem to keep hanging in there. Get outside help to get a new perspective on what to do. Then you can move forward. 


LEO (Jul 23 - Aug 22)
Very creative time for you at work. You may have to do some unexpected work. Just do it. Good time to check up on your health. 


VIRGO (Aug 23 - Sep 22)
Still spending too much. It may be work related here. You have a level head here and you can handle it. Keep busy physically to relieve pressure.

 

LIBRA (Sep 23 - Oct 22)
You want to take a short trip but others demands put a damper on that idea. Go to the movies or something close to home. It will relieve the stress. 

 

SCORPIO (Oct 23 - Nov 21)
Life is going to throw some surprises for a while. This is a good time to check out your physical health and get into a fitness routine. 


SAGITTARIUS (Nov 22 - Dec 21)
Life is becoming a little distracting but your good nature will get you through it all. Think about taking care of yourself for now. 


CAPRICORN (Dec 22 - Jan 19)
The work load finally lightens up a little as you get some creative ideas to handle problems. You can acomplish a lot here and enjoy it. 


AQUARIUS (Jan 20 - Feb 18)
You are taking on more then you can handle at this time. Slow down and cherry pick social and work issues. Unexpected surprises keep popping up some good, some not so much. 


PISCES (Feb 19 - Mar 20) 
Your intuition is right on track. You are very stable here do what you do and do it well. A lot of people are vying for your services. 

Not To Be Missed

 


Simply diVine

LA

The Los Angeles LGBT Center will host its annual food and drink fundraiser, Simply 
diVine, on Saturday, April 27, 2019, at 6:00 PM, at the iconic Hollywood Forever venue. This is LA’s premier food and wine event for LGBT people and their allies. Sample extraordinary food and drinks from LA’s most popular restaurants, food trucks, wineries, distilleries, breweries, and more. All proceeds support the LGBT Center’s many programs and services. Tickets for this event are $150, and expect them to be sold out soon! Hollywood Forever is located at 6800 Santa Monica Blvd, Los Angeles, CA, 90038. For tickets or more information, go to lalgbtcenter.org.




Valley of the Dolls


LA

Steve Tyler presents a benefit staged reading of Jacqueline Susann’s Valley of the Dolls for the Alcott Center for Mental Health and the Los Angeles LGBT Center, on May 3 and 4, at 8 PM, in Los Angeles. The reading includes Hollywood stars such as Wilson Cruz, Greg Louganis, Alec Mapa, Laraine Newman, Gordon Thompson, Joan Van Ark, and Bruce Vilanch. General admission for this event is $70. For priority seating and a post-show Dessert Reception with the cast, the cost is $120. This event will take place at the Renberg Theatre, located at 1125 N. McCadden Place, Los Angeles, CA, 90028. For tickets or more information, go to lalgbtcenter.org.




Vickie Shaw


LA


Comedian Vickie Shaw will present a comedy show at the Renberg Theatre, in Los Angeles, on May 11, 2019, at 8 PM. Shaw’s charming Southern style belies her sharp-edged wit and hilarity. Audiences love her humor, not just because she’s funny, but because her accounts are all true--from her stories about her wife, Sgt. Patch, her tales about her children and grandchildren, to her descriptions of growing up Southern Baptist, in Texas. Tickets for this event are $40. The Renberg Theatre is located at 1125 N. McCadden Place, Los Angeles, CA, 90028. For tickets or more information, go to lalgbtcenter.org.




Hollywood Vampires with Alice Cooper


SF


The Hollywood Vampires and Alice Cooper will perform at The Warfield Theatre, in San Francisco, CA, on Sunday May 12, 2019, at 8:00 PM. Cooper is an American singer, songwriter, and actor whose career spans over 50 years. In his early career, Cooper was known for his stage show that featured guillotines, electric chairs, fake blood, deadly snakes, baby dolls, and dueling swords. The Hollywood Vampires is an American rock super-group formed by Cooper, Johnny Depp, and Joe Perry to honor the music of rock stars who died from excess in the 1970’s. The Warfield is located at 982 Market Street, San Francisco, CA, 94102. Tickets for this event start in the $100 range. For tickets or more information, go to thewarfieldtheatre.com, or your favorite ticket seller.

 

 

 

Sarah Silverman

 

SF

 

Comedian Sarah Silverman will perform with Seth Rudetsky at the Herbst Theatre, in San Francisco, on May 19, 2019, at 8:00. Silverman is an American stand-up comedian, actress, producer, and writer. Her comedy addresses social taboos, and controversial topics, such as racism, sexism, politics, and religion. Seth Rudesky is an American musician, actor, writer, and radio host. The Herbst Theatre is located at 401 Van Ness Ave, San Francisco, CA, 94102. Tickets for this show are in the $100 range. For tickets, go to your favorite ticket seller, such as Seat Geek or Ticket Master.




Jerry Seinfeld


Fresno


Comedian Jerry Seinfeld will be at the Saroyan Theatre, in Fresno, on May 9, 2019, at 7:00 PM. Seinfeld is an American Stand-up comedian, actor writer, producer, and director. He is best known for playing himself in the sitcom Seinfeld, which he created and wrote with Larry David. The Saroyan Theatre is located at 700 M Street, Fresno, CA, 93721. Tickets for this event start at $50. Tickets can be purchased in person at the Selland Arena Box Office, or online through Ticket Master. For more information, go to fresnoconventioncenter.com.




Pentatonix


Fresno


Pentatonix will perform at the Save Mart Center, in Fresno, on May 14, 2019, at 7:30 PM. Pentatonix is an American a capella group from Arlington, Texas. Characterized by their pop-style arrangements with vocal harmonies, basslines, riffing, percussion, and beatboxing, they produce cover versions of modern pop music. The Save Mart Center is located at 2650 E. Shaw Ave, Fresno, CA, 93710. Tickets for this event start at the $30 range. For tickets or more information, go to savemart.centerfresno.org or your favorite ticket seller.

Events

 

FRESNO/CLOVIS
 

Gender Revolution
Thursday, April 25 at 11 AM - 12 PM
Fresno State's Cross Cultural and Gender Center
California State University Fresno, Fresno, CA 93740
A discussion group open to people of all genders that covers a range of topics relevant to people of all gender identities. We meet every 2nd and 4th Thursday from 11 a.m. - 12 p.m. A great way to meet like-minded friends! Snacks are provided so be sure to join us!
April 25th - Disability and Gender
May 9th - Sexism and Comics
facebook.com/events/599487887159990

 

Self Defense Workshop
Friday, April 26 at 2:30 PM - 4 PM
Fresno State's Cross Cultural and Gender Center
California State University Fresno, Fresno, CA 93740
In honor of Sexual Assault Awareness Month we will be holding a free self-defense workshop for students. There is limited space so be sure to register at CCGCSelfDefense.eventbrite.com as soon as possible if you'd like to attend!
facebook.com/events/230912917754538

 

DRAG 101
Saturday, April 27 at 12 PM - 4 PM
Common Space
1252 Fulton St., Fresno, CA 93721
Have you ever wanted to do drag or maybe wanted to step your game up? Please join us April 27th 2019 from 12pm-4pm.  
*** THIS IS A FREE EVENT FOR ALL AGES ***
Classes will include the following: 
MUG (Makeup)
Body (hips) 
What did she say? (Social media)
Who does she think she is? (Drag etiquette)
Q&A panel, and more. Hostesses Leilani Price and Nikita Rage
For more information or if you are interested in participating please contact Leilani Price or Nikita Rage.
facebook.com/events/2199096923640656

 

De Colores, A Queer Latinx Gathering
Sunday, April 28 at 1 PM -2 PM
Common Space
1252 Fulton St. Fresno, CA 93721
A social support group for the Latinx LGBT+ community to gather and support one another through food and conversation. Questions? Email Daniel Mendoza at daniel@commonspacefresno.org
Una reunión para LGBT+ Latinxs | Un grupo social para la comunidad Latinx y LGBT+ para que personas convivan y que apoyen a cada uno entre la comida y conversación. Para preguntas contacten a Daniel Mendoza, daniel@commonspacefresno.org
facebook.com/events/348545945764823

 

Volunteer Roundup #2 
Sunday, April 28 at 6 PM - 8 PM
El Patio Mexican Restaurant
552 E Olive Ave, Fresno, CA 93728
Back by demand, the second and last Fresno Rainbow Pride Volunteer Roundup for 2019!
Only by coming #2gether can we ensure that the 2019 Fresno Rainbow Pride Parade and Festival will be bigger and better than ever.
We are growing and we NEED YOU! 
Join us for a fun night full of great food, drinks and prizes. Get information, updates and answers to any questions you may have about being a part of one of the largest community events in the valley. 
ALL ARE WELCOME. ALL AGES. NO EXPERIENCE needed and there is absolutely no obligation. We’d love to meet you!
facebook.com/events/411853472962993


Silent No More Photovoice Project with Fresno's Trans Community
Thursday, May 2 at 5 PM - 9 PM
Common Space 
1252 Fulton St. Fresno, CA 93721
Open to the Public! As part of the Feminist Activism Class's project to focus on Fresno's Transgender community's experiences of homelessness and everyday violence, the students are working with members of the Trans community to document their experiences through storytelling and photography.  The photographs collected will be displayed at Common Space's Art Night and will be up for the entire month. The Feminist Activism Class will also be launching the completed Transgender Housing Report at this Event. We will also be celebrating the end of POWER's Hygiene Kit Drive for LGBTQ+ Homeless Youth. Please join us for this special event dedicated to amplifying the voices of the Trans community. If you are interested in participating in the project, please contact Dr. Kat Fobear katherinefobear@mail.fresnostate.edu
facebook.com/events/2005296319777183

 

Friends of Pride Fundraiser
Saturday, May 4 at 7 PM
Tacos Marquitos
1772 E Barstow Ave, Fresno, CA 93710
Friends of Pride come 2gether to bring you the last dinner and show fundraiser benefiting Fresno Pride 2019! Always a sold out event. All ages. Come for the food, stay for the entertainment. Tickets available at the door. Tickets are limited, please arrive early. Dinner begins at 7PM. Show 8:30PM. $15 Dinner and Show. $10 Show only.
facebook.com/events/1993072867667984


Remembering Stonewall 50 Years of Impact from New York to Fresno
Monday, May 6 at 5:30 PM - 7:30 PM
Smittcamp Alumni House
2625 E Matoian Way, Fresno, CA 93740
Food and Drinks will be served
Parking Code: 629978
Please join us for a celebration and reflection of the 50th anniversary of the Stonewall Inn riots with a screening of the acclaimed documentary Stonewall Uprising followed by a panel of distinguished activists and community leaders. 
In the early morning hours of Saturday, June 28, 1969, police led a raid at the Stonewall Inn, a bar located in Greenwich Village in New York. It wasn’t uncommon for police to lead raids there and in other Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans, and Queer (LGBTQ) -friendly areas, arresting and harassing the customers. 
But this time, unsuspectingly, patrons fought back with “uncharacteristic fury and outrage" at the police which lead to five consecutive nights of protests and further activism. The first ever gay pride parade was lead outside of Stonewall Inn a year later. 
Today, many of us consider the riots at the Stonewall Inn as the beginning of the modern LGBTQ rights movement. Stonewall's impact went beyond a tiny bar in New York, it spurred other communities to mobilize and protest against LGBTQ discrimination, homophobia, and transphobia. 
We are honored to host a special panel reflecting on the impact of Stonewall, especially here in Fresno. Our guest include key members of the community and lifelong activists. 
This event will be followed by our 2018-2019 Safe Zone Recognition Ceremony 
The Safe Zone Program is dedicated to providing training and education on being an LGBTQ+ ally on campus. 
For more information about the Safe Zone Program, please email: Dr. John Beynon: jbeynon@csufresno.edu 
For more information about this event, please email: Dr. Kat Fobear: katherinefobear@mail.fresnostate.ed
facebook.com/events/383103365840772

 

LGBTQA+ Community Health Needs Focus Group
Tuesday, May 14 at 5:30 PM - 7 PM
Common Space
1252 Fulton St. Fresno, CA 93721
Fresno Metro Ministry and Fresno Community Health Improvement Partnership have teamed up with Central Valley Health Policy Institute (Fresno State) to conduct a Community Health Needs Assessment of Fresno County. This project is being funded by the Department of Public Health. Our objective to collect data from 11 geo-specific areas (rural communities and urban neighborhoods)  and over 20 diverse populations and sectors to create a comprehensive report that goes both deep and wide into our communities to address their health priorities.
PLEASE RSVP here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1u94gicDWUZKS889Ik34io6ZD4eNIle98qRfD5E9xg2o/edit
facebook.com/events/2375703159364306

 

Celebrating Pride Before There Was A Fresno Pride Parade
Tuesday, May at 6:30 PM - 8:30 PM
Tacos Marquitos
 1772 E Barstow Ave, Fresno, CA 93710
Qistory is hosting a community gathering to share memories and stories of the LGBTQ+ community celebrating each other before we had the Rainbow Pride Parade. We are looking for community members to share stories with our community researchers on how the LGBTQ+ celebrated pride and each other. From shopping cart parades at the Metro and The Red Latern to Amazing IDC productions. We need your stories! We will be displaying oral histories, photographs, and any other collected memorabilia at this year's Fresno Rainbow Pride Parade on June 1st. Qistory will be hosting its second booth dedicated to the history of the LGBTQ+ community in Fresno. Please join us for this storytelling event. All are welcome and open to the public. We need your input to make this booth happen!
facebook.com/events/324819598222840

 

Coronation XLVI: Midnight at the Met Gala The Royal Garden
May 23 at 5 PM - 10 PM
Radisson Hotel Fresno Conference Center
1055 Van Ness Ave, Fresno, CA 93721
SAVE THE DATE!! 
CORONATION XLVI:  MIDNIGHT AT THE MET GALA THE ROYAL GARDEN
MORE INFORMATION WILL BE RELEASED SOON!!!
facebook.com/events/1209560332554210

29th Annual Fresno Rainbow Pride Parade & Festival
Saturday, June 1 at 10 AM -3 PM
Tower District, Fresno, CA 93728
It is with pride we invite you to one of the largest LGBTQ event in the Central Valley! Parade is FREE to attend. 10AM. Olive Ave, beginning at Palm and ending at Moroa. Festival, 11AM-3PM, $5 admission located on N. Fulton Ave. 
This year's theme is "2GETHER". With a record breaking attendance last year, let's make 2019 Fresno Rainbow Pride Parade and Festival bigger than ever!
Presented by Community Link, Inc.
facebook.com/events/2243173406008446



 

 

MERCED
 

LGBTQ Awarness & Sensitivity Training
Saturday, April 27 at 1 PM - 3:30 PM
Merced County Library
2100 O St. Merced, CA 95340
Designed to help you become a better ally for the LGBTQ+ community. Improve your interpersonal and professional relationships with LGBTQ+ people. An in-depth overview of gender and sexual orientation followed by a sensitivity training perfect for families of LGBTQ+ individuals as well as those who work with the general public.
Jen Ramos (Youth Leadership Institute) and Eli Sachse (Registered Nurse and facilitator of the Gender Non-Conforming Group of Merced) both presented recently at Merced's first LGBTQ+ Youth Conference on these subjects and are happy to assist the general public with any questions they may have following the presentation and training. We ask that you please share this with anyone who may benefit from this training and thank you for doing so.
facebook.com/events/2332388096811583


Gender Non-Conforming Support Group
Wednesday, May 1 at 6:30 PM - 8 PM
Merced Multicultural Arts Center 
645 W Main St. Merced CA 95340
 peer-led support group for gender expansive and questioning individuals. Trans led and facilitated. All ages and identities welcome. Family, friends and allies welcome at the facilitator's discretion.
Please join us at our new location at the MAC downtown. Enter through the back of the building, up to the third floor, the classroom floor. Look for the trans flag.
Join our friendly group to support each other through our incredible journeys.
facebook.com/events/325565358145530





MODESTO
 

MoPRIDE Board Meeting
Monday, April 22 at 6 PM - 8 PM
400 12th St. Ste 2, Modesto, CA 95354
Open to the public! Join the MoPRIDE Board of Directors as we discuss future projects, fundraisers, and ongoing work to strengthen the LGBTQ+ community in the Central Valley. Each meeting includes time for public comment. Come by, get informed, and be heard!
facebook.com/events/3137154792968716


MoPride Pride 2019 Planning Meeting
Sunday, April 28 at 3 PM - 4:30 PM
MoPride
400 12th St. Ste 2, Modesto, CA 95354
Help us create a truly exciting, inclusive, and dynamic Modesto Pride!
We will be creating committees to assist with various aspects such as entertainment, vendors, volunteers, etc. There are lots of opportunity to get involved with your favorite aspect of community event.
facebook.com/events/303057330376003



 

OAKLAND
 

White Allyship Accountability Group
Monday, April 22 at 7 PM - 8:30 PM
Oakland LGBTQ Community Center
3207 Lakeshore Ave (Rand Ave Entrance) Oakland, CA 94610
A white-identified LGBTQIA+ affinity group for anti-racist solidarity and accountability, centered on equity and deconstructing whiteness by understanding historical context, sharing individual experiences and events, uplifting and celebrating people of color, and developing a practice of healing languages and behaviors. No one will be turned away; all are welcome. This event takes place at the Oakland LGBTQ Community Center, Oakland's Black-led, multiracial center for LGBTQIA+ community, in the Cafe, an ADA accessible space. Accessibility Notes: The center is accessible from sidewalk level by elevator. All rooms are wheelchair accessible. The bathrooms are gender neutral and wheelchair accessible. The room we meet in has a variety of seating for a variety of body sizes including straight backed chairs and a couple of comfy sofas.  The Center is low fragrance and not fragrance free. We keep individuals’ neurodivergence in mind both in our methods of sharing and by keeping a less stimulating, quiet, safer space available. We do not currently have accessibility for ASL interpretation. For accessibility questions, please call the Oakland LGBTQ Center at (510) 882-2286
facebook.com/events/294074697902247



 

SAN FRANCISCO
 

Wimples of The World - 40 Years of Habits
Opening Reception: Wednesday, April 17, 2019, 5:00 PM – 8:30 PM
Exhibition Dates: April 17th – May 11th, 2019
Location: Harvey Milk Photo Center, 50 Scott St. San Francisco
Join the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence for our opening reception of W.O.W – 40 Years of Habits, an exhibition celebrating the unique coronets and wimples (headdresses) worn by Sister around the country & world.
The Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence are dotted all along the West Coast of the Americas, from Vancouver BC to South America in Uruguay, from Dallas Texas to Greenville South Carolina. You will also find Sisters in Europe, from Paris to Berlin, London & Edinburgh and so many other fabulous cities around the world.
http://harveymilkphotocenter.org/exhibits/w-o-w-40-years-of-habits/




VISALIA
 

HIV Peer Support+ Social Group
Sunday, April 21 at 6 PM - 7 PM
The Source LGBT+ Center
Peer Support+ Social group for LGBT+ people who are living with HIV/AIDS. Come for the resources, stay for the friendships :) For more information contact dean@thesourcelgbt.org.
facebook.com/events/330189137610659


Pride Visalia 2019 
Saturday, May 25 at 11 AM - 4 PM
The Old Lumberyard, 300 E Oak St Visalia, CA 93291
Pride Visalia returns with more of everything you love: things to see, things to buy, rainbow/pride gear, music, drag shows, talent, arts, selfie spots, portrait studios, food, snacks, drinks, and good vibes. Whew!  We pack a year's planning to make these 5 hours the best ever.  
$5 general admission **Cash only entrance day of. See below for details**
$125 VIP All Access Passes (see Eventbrite for details)
facebook.com/events/801571926878364

 

 

Contact Us

P O Box 4959, Fresno, CA 93744

newslnk@aol.com  |  Tel: 559-266-5465


News and happenings for, by, about and affecting the LGBT Valley.
Let us know if you have any questions or suggestions at:
newslnk@aol.com

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